How To Know If He's Serious Or Not...

are you wondering how seriousyour man is about you and your relationship?Does he tell you that he loves you or lovesspending time with you, but he hasn't made a realCOMMITMENT to you yet?If so, you may be feeling a little anxious aboutthe future of your relationship.That's why you need to check out my "From CasualTo Committed" program. In it, you'll learn exactlywhat it takes for a man to quickly decide that heneeds to commit to you and ONLY you.If you don't know what the secret is to why a manwill decide to commit to one woman and notanother, you may be doing or saying things to himthat are literally pushing him away from you,emotionally.Have you ever been in a happy relationship with aman, and even though things were going well youstarted to WORRY about where it's all going?This worrying usually starts around the time whenyou feel that you're connecting and starting tohave strong feelings for him.You've naturally become exclusive with him andassume he's exclusive with you, too.You have a great time when you're together.He's introduced you to his friends and maybe evensome of his family.He's met your friends. You've spent some holidaystogether. Celebrated birthdays and specialoccasions. Went on weekend trips together.It just keeps getting better and better.It feels really good to be so "in sync" with aguy.But it isn't long before it dawns on you...You have a very special connection and you want itto last. And because it's so good, you start tothink that maybe you've finally found your Mr.Right.That's why you're anxious about something goingwrong, or about him suddenly "changing his mind"about you.Maybe that sort of thing happened to youbefore...or maybe you've been hearing too many"horror stories" from friends who have experiencedthis.So even though things are going "great" and you'rereally connecting, you're also beginning to freakout just a little.This is precisely the moment where a lot of womenmake a crucial mistake.They start to let their FEAR and insecurity takeover. Instead of being secure because therelationship is going well and the guy seems likea good guy, they start to be afraid that it won'tlast, or that it isn't "real."This leads to a desire to KNOW exactly what theman is thinking and feeling.It doesn't matter that he's being affectionate andattentive and that there's really no reason tofeel anxious.Fear is a powerful motivator, and it leads a womanto ask a man the WRONG questions at the WRONG timein the WRONG way. These questions can actuallymake a man want to withdraw.Don't get me wrong...A lot of women have had a good experience asking aman these questions because they've approached itin a completely different way than I'm about toillustrate. I'll reveal how in just a minute...But first, getting back to this crucial mistake...OK, so you're feeling a little freaked out, eventhough things are fairly happy in yourrelationship... because of something that happenedin your past or because of the stories you heardfrom your friends.Maybe in the past you were completely "hooked" ona guy, thinking that he was "The One", whensuddenly he decided he wasn't ready, couldn'tcommit, wanted to go back to his ex, or was seeingsomeone else already.It affected you in a bad way, and took you a longtime to get over it.So you begin wondering and worrying about what'sgoing on NOW, even though it's a completelydifferent guy and a completely differentsituation.You start to look for clues about his level of"seriousness" in the things he says and does, butnothing seems obvious to you, and you're still notsatisfied.So you begin to look for the right time to ask oneof these three questions, (if not all of them):QUESTION THAT CAN MAKE HIM WITHDRAW #1: HOW DO YOUFEEL ABOUT ME?-- Is this love or is this just a fling? Are yourfeelings for me real and lasting?QUESTION THAT CAN MAKE HIM WITHDRAW #2: WHERE ISTHIS GOING?-- What will happen to us a year from now? ShouldI be making my future plans around us moving intogether someday? Would you like to get marriedsomeday?QUESTION THAT CAN MAKE HIM WITHDRAW #3: ARE YOUSERIOUS ABOUT US?-- Or are you just in this for "now" but notthinking anything serious or long-term?These are the thoughts swirling around your headalmost constantly, especially after you gettogether with him.You want to know where the relationship is going.You NEED to know. You don't want to be "strungalong" for months and months, only to have yourheart broken.You don't want to be wasting your time.There are certain things you want from arelationship, and you want to know that he's goingto be able to come through for you.That's when you decide you're going to sit downand have "A Talk". You're nervous about it, so youwait for just the right time...You don't want to seem pushy or needy, so you mayeven rehearse what you're going to say in yourmind.Finally, the moment comes and you blurt outeverything you've been thinking and feeling fordays and weeks...But things don't go exactly the way you imagined.He's not reassuring or relaxed. He's not tenderand affectionate.And he's certainly not wrapping you in his arms totell you how much he loves you and wants tocommit!He's actually a little WORRIED. "Frustrated" wouldalmost be the right word. Maybe even annoyed!Uh oh.He acts put off, as if you're now "hassling" himand pressuring him to do or be a certain way. Hetells you he's "not sure" or maybe "not ready" tomake any promises to you.He tells you that he cares about you...BUT...he"needs more time."Or any number of reasonable or non-reasonableexcuses as to why he can't answer your questionsor make a commitment to you RIGHT NOW.You don't get it.All you wanted was to know where the relationshipwas heading!You weren't trying to hassle him or force him tomake a decision on the spot. You just wanted toknow where you stand as a couple.Now YOU'RE angry, HE'S angry, and you regret everhaving brought it up.Because now he's being distant. He's changedtoward you a little bit. He's not quite asaffectionate. Maybe he's a little distracted. Alittle cold.And it scares you.If you've ever been in this situation, or if youFEAR being in this situation, you're not alone. Somany women worry about how to approach a man aboutthese 3 common questions. And that'sunderstandable...But there's something I need you to know about menand how they "see" commitment.Men and women have different timelines when itcomes to commitment.A woman may think "it's time" for a man to commitafter a certain amount of months has passed, orcertain things have happened...like after he'sintroduced you to his family and celebrated a fewholidays with you.But it's not NECESSARILY the same way a manthinks.A man decides he wants to be with YOU and ONLY YOUand make a real commitment based on how you makehim FEEL.Whether it's been 2 weeks, 2 months, or 2 years.It doesn't matter.If a man is feeling that "something special" aboutyou, he's going to be thinking of how he can haveyou in his life for the long-term. If he feelsthat his life is much better with you in it, or ismuch easier and happier and more fulfilled, thenhe'll do what he has to do to make sure you're inhis life for good.A man doesn't make a decision to commit because ofa series of events that he's mentally checkedoff...or because "it's time" to get serious.Or because it's been 2 months and you've beenphysical and enjoyed each other's company and youlike doing the same kinds of things together.Unless you're triggering that "forever" feeling inhim ANOTHER WAY, a man isn't going to feelcompelled to bring up the issue of "commitment"with you.And if you bring it up first when he's not"feeling" it...then he'll feel put off andpressured.A man making the decision to commit to you isDEFINITELY not the result of any one "talk" youhave with him where you're asking him where it'sgoing based on your OWN AGENDA.You see, that's the key.Once you stop thinking of what it is you want andwhy you're right and he's wrong, and start to becurious about what HE wants and what he isfeeling, you can completely shift the vibe you'reputting off...and change the way he feelscompletely.You can and SHOULD communicate what you want to aman and set certain STANDARDS from the start.But you have to do it from the start...not keepthings bottled up, "hoping" he's thinking andintending the same things from the relationshipthat you are, and then feel upset and confusedwhen months later you find out that he doesn't.Look... I generally avoid "rules" with men,because all men are unique and there is no suchthing as "one rule fits all." But here's a rule,so listen up...You HAVE to let a man know that you don'twant to casually date forever FROM THE START, ifthat's your intention.But the trick for lots of women, even though theydo this in their own way, is that you CANNOT dothis through pressure or any kind of passive-aggressive or weak, convincing types of behavior.Putting pressure on people in importantsituations and choices in life causes more harmthan good- you won't get a positive response.This is what I mean when I say that there arecertain questions that MAKE a man withdraw. Thequestions of "where's this going?" and "what doyou feel about me?" put pressure on a man or elsetry to convince him that things should be aCERTAIN WAY.If you let a man know what you will and won'ttolerate in a relationship early on, then he won'tfeel cornered or "hassled."Here's exactly how to do this...Say, "I will only keep seeing you rightnow if this is going somewhere and you aren'tseeing anyone else, because I'm not and Idon't want to waste my time."When you say this to a guy, there's anunconscious button that's pushed in his mind thatbasically tells him and instills the belief that"this is a respectable and desirable woman who hasthe ability and the strength to pick and choosewhat happens in her life and with men, so I bettermake good of the situation."If all this goes well and you start becomingcloser and closer to a man after weeks or a coupleof months, then it's time to say in a calm andcasual voice-"I'm happy with you and I want to keep dating...but the future's important to me too.So let's see how we feel about things over thenext few weeks or months (set a time here you feelcomfortable with), and we'll decide where this isgoing and to continue if there's something moreserious that we're both interested in and want."And "Kaboom." This is like the ultimateground-shaker for a man.Careful when you do this, though. For some womenthis might be risky and sound a bit harsh, but thething is, if a man is at all interested or seriousabout you, then watch out after thisconversation...He's going to suddenly be wildly open,affectionate and want more with you. Don't let itscare you when you see such a big sudden shift.It's normal for a man to act this way after awoman says this to him.I devote an entire chapter to what to do and sayto make sure you start with the right "end" inmind when you're dating a man in my eBook, "CatchHim and Keep Him."On page 248 I reveal how to push his secret"communication button"... which is really a way toget a man to open up and share his thoughts andfeelings about your relationship.When you push this "button", you'll find out whathe really thinks and feels about ANYTHING you wantto know about.Now, why do men perceive being asked "where isthis going?" as some kind of weird, needy ploy?It depends on the timing of the question and thecontext with which it's brought up, of course, butone of the main reasons they feel this way has todo with TIMING and ATTRACTION.If you ask a man how he feels about you or therelationship before he's had a chance to develop astrong emotional attraction toward you, and beforehe even knows himself where he wants therelationship to go, he's going to perceive yourquestions as you looking for APPROVAL or directionfrom him.It would be like you going on a first date to anice restaurant with a man you barely knew andhearing him ask you as he was finishing his meal,"OK, now that we've gotten to know each other, andI'm paying for this meal, how about if we go to myplace and have sex?"I'm willing to bet that if a man asked you that ona first date, you'd feel totally put off. You'dfeel offended and grossed out. Ewwww....no classwhatsoever. Check please!When you ask a man how he feels about you or yourrelationship before he's had a chance to figureout his own feelings, it brings about the samekind of "ewww" feeling in him, too.If you're not telling him what your boundaries andstandards are, but instead you're seekingdirection and approval, he'll look for ways to"cool" things because he'll lose ATTRACTION foryou.Talking to a man about your relationship orworrying about "where it's going" isn't going tomake him FEEL anything for you.Neither is wanting to "skip" all that tiresomedating and just get right to the "real thing,"either.Men have a different timeline and attitude when itcomes to commitment, and unless you know what thatis, you'll be feeling pretty frustrated by a man's"wishy washy" behavior.When he tells you that he values his "freedom" youwon't understand why his single life is moreattractive than spending time with YOU.In my program "From Casual To Committed" you'lllearn why men say they want their FREEDOM. You'lllearn what that really means and how you cancommunicate to a man that by choosing you, he'snot giving up what he perceives as his "freedom."You'll discover why a man can give you hisattention and "love" but still choose to be aloneand single.Most importantly, you'll hear for yourself what aman's commitment process is, and how you canidentify his secret "love preferences" so that youcreate the FEELINGS in him that will make him wantto commit to you and keep you forever.I created this program to help you understand howthe commitment process works for a man and to helpyou learn the steps to triggering his desire tocommit to you...without heavy "talks", drama orultimatums.So stop feeling anxious and worried about whetheror not a man will actually want to commit to you,or whether you're wasting precious time and energyon a man who may NEVER commit.I'll talk to you again soon and best of luck inLife and Love,Your Friend,Christian CarterP.S. Every one of us dreams of having that"storybook romance love" with the one person wewere meant to spend the rest of our lives with...Don't let a misunderstanding of what a man isfeeling about you and your relationship RUIN yourchances for that happily ever after.It may not be that he doesn't want to commit ever,it may just be that he's on a different point inthe PROCESS with you...