Lessons for my future sons (Part Four)

I don’t look at this as a list of DON’Ts, it’s more a guideline for if you don’t know what to do in a situation. Like the situations below:
31. If any one far surpasses others, either in age, estate, or merit yet would give place to a meaner than himself in his own lodging or elsewhere the one ought not to except it, so he on the other part should not use much earnestness nor offer it above once or twice.
If you’re sleeping over at someone’s home and they offer you their biggest bed, you should politely decline. Of if that someone gets up from the head of the table and offers you the seat, politely decline. But if he insists, don’t make him beg you more than twice, just take whatever is offered with gratitude.
32. To one that is your equal, or not much inferior you are to give the chief place in your lodging and he to who ‘tis offered ought at the first to refuse it but at the second to accept though not without acknowledging his own unworthiness.
Basically it’s like a dance you do in refusing an offer and offering a greater offer. Just keep in mind who is senior in age and stature, and not to patronise them if they don’t accept what you’re offering but let it go.
33. They that are in dignity or in office have in all places preceedency but whilst they are young they ought to respect those that are their equals in birth or other qualitys, though they have no publick charge.
To cut it short, respect your elders.
34. It is good manners to prefer them to whom we speak before ourselves especially if they be above us with whom in no sort we ought to begin.
Mommy has learnt this the hard way with her being opinionated, but you’re young and can still be formed to hold your peace and listen to others. Especially those older than you, even if you do not agree. Listen to them and then speak your mind after. You might miss out on some nuggets of wisdom if you rush to offer your opinion first.
35. Let your discourse with men of business be short and comprehensive.
‘Nuff sed. Don’t you just hate long-winded emails that shroud the point?
36. Artificers & persons of low degree ought not to use many ceremonies to lords,or others of high degree but respect and highly honor them, and those of high degree ought to treat them with affability & courtesie, without arrogancy.
Don’t over praise dignitaries, while at the same time treat your servants with courtesy and not arrogance. Don’t mind the spelling, the 1800s were formative years for the English language I think. I could have just made that up.
37. In speaking to men of quality do not lean nor look them full in the face, nor approach too near them at lest keep a full pace from them.
Nowadays ‘men of quality’ have bodyguards and your walking too close to them might be seen as an affront and you’ll be shot. So keep your distance children and keep a humble posture at all times.
38. In visiting the sick, do not play the physician if you be not knowing therein.
Your advice to a sick person might actually kill them because people in a weak state will listen to anything to get better. So if you’re not a doctor, hold your peace and sympathise instead.
39. In writing or speaking, give to every person his due title according to his degree & the custom of the place.
Some people might be offended if you do not address them correctly. Address and ambassador as ‘Honourable’, a prince as ‘Your Royal Highness’, but most importantly know the army rank of whatever army person you’re writing to. They take these things seriously and will not take you seriously if you give them a wrong rank. This applies to any forces, be it police, air force, or marine.
40. Strive not with your superiors in argument, but always submit your judgment to others with modesty.
Our ‘superiors’ are a special breed, especially in thinking they know more than you do. So in whatever you do, do not argue. Instead, give your opinion and let it rest. You might be the wiser by not raising your voice or esteeming your opinion above another’s.