The Simple Truth

Angry rain drops eventually stopped pelting my window making me realize how very quiet it was. I l got up from the desk, tore my self away from the pictures I was editing and peeked outside. The sky, clearing after the summer storm, seemed friendly, almost inviting.I left the window, went to the kitchen to refill on coffee and slipped out to the balcony. A gentle moist wind blew in my direction ruffling my already messy hair. I took slow deliberate breaths enjoying the nothingness that surrounded me. It was then that I realized that the tight heaviness, the invisible weight I was feeling was neither stress nor chronic fatigue nor any of the excuses I usually give for any physical discomfort. I was finally on vacation and had time to do the things that make me smile. I had also had plenty of sleep, several fantastic morning runs and the subsequent long steamy showers. I knew then that the weight I couldn't shake was you. All of life's loud noises had faded out to reveal the simple truth about how badly I miss you. I stood out there for a while, in quiet acceptance...finally admitting my vulnerability partly to myself, but mostly to the wind. And then came the inevitable tears;tears held back for as many months as reasons finally slid down the sides of my face dropping out of sight like delayed drops of rain. In the distance, the tops of trees smiled at me, like big soft green cotton balls.